Saturday, October 17, 2009

Trust Part II

TRUSTING: THE NEXT STEP
Last week I blogged about how my first attempt at a bike ride in over a year, as well as it being a tandem bike I hadn't been on before, taught me a lot about trust. This week I trusted Tom again as he took me out on a tandem bike again.

The second ride was as fun as the first, but I think my trust level was a little higher. Since I had ridden with Tom before, I knew what to expect and he was faithful again as a leader. We're supposed to go on ride number three next week.

One of the things that I have learned over the years as a follower of Jesus is that my trust (faith) in Him can increase as I see His faithfulness in my life. I can look back over the time since I began to follow Jesus and see the faithfulness of God.

Therefore, when new opportunities arise for me to place my trust/faith in God, sometimes it is easier - because God has been faithful in the past, I know He will be faithful in the present and the future. Since I am human, I don't always cling to that truth and can become anxious and focused on the challenge instead of focusing on God.

TRUST NEXT STEPS
This past weekend (October 10 and 11) it was announced to my church where I have been on staff for just over three years that I was going on permanent disability and will no longer be working on our ministry staff at Lakeside church.

TRUST
It was a hard, but relatively easy, decision for me to make. It was hard because I loved working at Lakeside. A wonderful staff team, incredible vision of service, and tremendous people who make up our church. I had the opportunity to use my gifts and talents in some neat ways.

It was a relatively easy decision in that my brain is still having its challenges - memory, processing, multi-tasking, impatience, frustration, and being overwhelmed are some of the challenges with my brain injury. Though physically I feel well, I knew I was not ready to return to work now and I am uncertain at what point in time I may be ready.

It was a wise decision for me as I can work on some recovery things. I will also look into volunteer opportunities. It is possible that I will have the opportunity to work with an organization or two to speak to people about drinking, driving and distractions.

TRUST CAN LEAD TO PEACE
How do I feel? I am sad and working through this loss. I am also at peace, because I believe that this is God's direction for my life. I also believe that God does have a plan for my life. I may not know what that is today, but I know I can trust God with my today and with my future.

Faithful and trustworthy: that is who God is.

I will continue to live in California and attend Lakeside Church. I will continue to work on exercises to help my brain, reading, and doing some writing. And I will seek to continue to trust God and His leading and provision for my life.

1 comment:

Sally-Girl! said...

Kathi, You make me weep knowing you are not coming back fulltime at Lakeside as we needed you and at the same time I am just so grateful that God spared your life. You are so right that our trustworthy Father has a plan for you. He will guide you through it. I will be watching to see where He takes you and at the same time will continue being a prayer warrior for YOU!!!!